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Back then, if you had the good fortune to make a family, you held onto it. In the lesbian world, serial monogamy was safe, and also fulfilling.

Women can have kids, too, so sometimes lesbians had those.

Maybe they’ve been your friend for years and you matched on tinder last night and decided to go for it. Say you had a good time and want to see her again and see what happens.

Maybe there’s some other reason you want to get big and sweeping and romantic. But remember how you’re keeping your expectations low? Don’t think of a good first date as one that leads to a second.

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The best thing is to let the conversation flow naturally. If you don’t know what to talk about, remember you can ask about pretty much anything — you don’t know about their neighborhood, their job, their roommates, their pets, their favourite tv show as a kid, whether or not they believe in astrology, whether or not they believe in weeding their houseplants, when they got that killer haircut, what they did this weekend, or anything else. Don’t pretend you like movies (or, say, monogamy) just because she does and she’s really pretty and you want to see her again. Sex ed almost never includes queer women or our experiences, so we’re exploring pleasure, safety, relationships and more to make that information more accessible.Hanna Rosin posted a piece at Slate's Double X last week about gay male couples and monogamy--or rather their lack of it.Rosin said that some gay couples' resistance to monogamy might be a model that hetero couples could learn from.In general, the butches tended to work, with blue-collar labor offering somewhat steady employment for masculine-presenting women (unions in particular offered some protection from harassment and firing).